Why god. Why?
Now I like a drink.
Don't get the wrong idea. I am not a pisshead. I don't hit the bottle every morning and end up snarling at people at work like a tramp at Kings Cross. I don't really drink during the week except accidentally (yeah, ok, I may drink sometimes during the week).
I do like to bend my arm occasionally. Almost all of my friends drink so our social occasions tend to be in a pub. All well and good. I have had a lot of good times involving alcohol, mind you I have also had some fist bitingly embarrassing times too.
Booze seems to stimulate the 'this is a good idea' section of my brain while blocking 'the sweet jesus no' section. While this swashbuckling attitude is in place I have accomplished stuff that I'd hesitate to even consider sober (this can be good or bad).
I read a post of andraste's about her eye brows hurting from a hangover and decided it's a good job I am an athieist otherwise I'd be insisting that god is a killjoy.
I know that alcohol is poisonous. I know it screws us up and kills off large amounts of brain cells. I know it isn't liver friendly but it is a giggle.
It's a bugger not having a deity to blame for hangovers. Surely when you feel that bad there should be someone other than you to blame. I usually blame the girl that suggested tequila shots (you know who you are and you did it to me (again) a couple of weekends ago).
Anyway, hangovers are definitely on my room 101 list. Waking up to a little voice saying "This is the best you are going to feel all day matey. Get ready for a serious downward spiral".
Your brain panics for a second. You have no asprin. The fridge is the north face of the Eiger away. Wait! you have no fizzy drinks anyway as you used it as mixers last night. When you ran out of mixers you drank what was left of the vodka neat. Then you drank the blue bols. The stench of minty booze is all over you. you'd think it'd be better than the normal morning booze taste but no, it's like the colgate beast took a crap in your mouth (thank god you didn't have any malibu).
It's at this point you try to smile in a 'whoo hoo did I have a good night last night way' but the very act of moving your facial muscles brings on a wave of pain and nausea that makes you wish for death and seriously mitigates against trying to get up.
You have to though. Your bladder is needing emptying and your mouth is in need of cold, fizzy drink. You know you are going to have to settle for luke warm water but no point laying that on yourself until you have to.
You try to get up without moving for a bit then drag yourself vaguely upright. Head in hands you try to negotiate the the way to the bathroom.
It's at this point you will have an experience based on whether or not you are single. If you have a girlfriend you will most likely step on an upturned hairbrush. If you are single it could be the plug of something facing up. Either way it's going to hurt.
You can't hop as that will induce exorcist style vomiting. Take time out to try to hold your head and foot at the same time. Your balance will be shot so you will most likely fall over. Try to aim for the bed, or at least to avoid anything with sharp edges.
(I once got a musical toilet roll holder that played jingle bells. When I'd had a skinful on xmas day night it was hilarious. When I stepped on it the next morning and set it off it was like a punishment from the gods. Hungover tryng to find a screeching, repetetive, loud bit of xmas tat under a pile of clothes is no joke.)
Of course all this is worse if you wake up in someone elses bed. If they are still asleep and you were particularly drunk you may have to tug the sheets back a bit to see whether it was beer goggles or she really was as hot as you thought.
There is also the etiquette of the morning after to consider. Let's face it, neither of you are going to be looking your best. Lets hope you remember her/his name. If not could it be the time to start trying out the word babe?
Worst bit? Knowing you have this feeling for the day. A shower, a fry up and a cold drink (try ginger beer, hangover fix tip of the century) may help a little but you are pretty much screwed for a while.
Promise never to drink again. It's usually good for a few hours. You know you are going to end up back in the boozer tonight. It's a Saturday and you promised. You'll try to stick to soft drinks but sooner or later a pint will be put in front of you and you will drink it.
What the hell, you will go through the hangoer again tomorrow but tomorrow is another day,right scarlett?
Don't get the wrong idea. I am not a pisshead. I don't hit the bottle every morning and end up snarling at people at work like a tramp at Kings Cross. I don't really drink during the week except accidentally (yeah, ok, I may drink sometimes during the week).
I do like to bend my arm occasionally. Almost all of my friends drink so our social occasions tend to be in a pub. All well and good. I have had a lot of good times involving alcohol, mind you I have also had some fist bitingly embarrassing times too.
Booze seems to stimulate the 'this is a good idea' section of my brain while blocking 'the sweet jesus no' section. While this swashbuckling attitude is in place I have accomplished stuff that I'd hesitate to even consider sober (this can be good or bad).
I read a post of andraste's about her eye brows hurting from a hangover and decided it's a good job I am an athieist otherwise I'd be insisting that god is a killjoy.
I know that alcohol is poisonous. I know it screws us up and kills off large amounts of brain cells. I know it isn't liver friendly but it is a giggle.
It's a bugger not having a deity to blame for hangovers. Surely when you feel that bad there should be someone other than you to blame. I usually blame the girl that suggested tequila shots (you know who you are and you did it to me (again) a couple of weekends ago).
Anyway, hangovers are definitely on my room 101 list. Waking up to a little voice saying "This is the best you are going to feel all day matey. Get ready for a serious downward spiral".
Your brain panics for a second. You have no asprin. The fridge is the north face of the Eiger away. Wait! you have no fizzy drinks anyway as you used it as mixers last night. When you ran out of mixers you drank what was left of the vodka neat. Then you drank the blue bols. The stench of minty booze is all over you. you'd think it'd be better than the normal morning booze taste but no, it's like the colgate beast took a crap in your mouth (thank god you didn't have any malibu).
It's at this point you try to smile in a 'whoo hoo did I have a good night last night way' but the very act of moving your facial muscles brings on a wave of pain and nausea that makes you wish for death and seriously mitigates against trying to get up.
You have to though. Your bladder is needing emptying and your mouth is in need of cold, fizzy drink. You know you are going to have to settle for luke warm water but no point laying that on yourself until you have to.
You try to get up without moving for a bit then drag yourself vaguely upright. Head in hands you try to negotiate the the way to the bathroom.
It's at this point you will have an experience based on whether or not you are single. If you have a girlfriend you will most likely step on an upturned hairbrush. If you are single it could be the plug of something facing up. Either way it's going to hurt.
You can't hop as that will induce exorcist style vomiting. Take time out to try to hold your head and foot at the same time. Your balance will be shot so you will most likely fall over. Try to aim for the bed, or at least to avoid anything with sharp edges.
(I once got a musical toilet roll holder that played jingle bells. When I'd had a skinful on xmas day night it was hilarious. When I stepped on it the next morning and set it off it was like a punishment from the gods. Hungover tryng to find a screeching, repetetive, loud bit of xmas tat under a pile of clothes is no joke.)
Of course all this is worse if you wake up in someone elses bed. If they are still asleep and you were particularly drunk you may have to tug the sheets back a bit to see whether it was beer goggles or she really was as hot as you thought.
There is also the etiquette of the morning after to consider. Let's face it, neither of you are going to be looking your best. Lets hope you remember her/his name. If not could it be the time to start trying out the word babe?
Worst bit? Knowing you have this feeling for the day. A shower, a fry up and a cold drink (try ginger beer, hangover fix tip of the century) may help a little but you are pretty much screwed for a while.
Promise never to drink again. It's usually good for a few hours. You know you are going to end up back in the boozer tonight. It's a Saturday and you promised. You'll try to stick to soft drinks but sooner or later a pint will be put in front of you and you will drink it.
What the hell, you will go through the hangoer again tomorrow but tomorrow is another day,right scarlett?
posted by Student at 11:30 am
3 Comments:
...But the damn stuff tastes so good.
Just found you and I think I'm going to like it here.
Welcome. A like minded soul, no doubt.
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