Busy, busy , busy

I guess everyone is right? This time of year is a little mental. Gotta move, gotta get the right gifts, get the food, get the booze. Need to sort out work before the holidays. What about a haircut? My place could do with a hoovering.

Ah bollocks to it.

No need to be worried. T'internet is the way forward. I shall be planning it next year. This year I tried to sort it early. Next year I shall sort it with technology.

So despite the fact I have too much to do, my team has shrunk due to leave, my list of things to do seems to be growing exponentially and I appear to have developed the plague (no black buboes yet but I wont be surprised if they arrive soon) I am fairly happy. I intend to meet what comes with a glass in my hand and two fingers in the air.

Merry bastard christmas God bless us every one.

To ease the passage of these dragging last few days I have turned to the eighties. I know I cursed the Stock, Aitken and Waterman stable unto the seventh generation but for cheese you just can't beat em. I need that cheese. Not just a cheddar either.

No.

I need full on camenbert, rochfort, gorgonzola even! I need it filthy and stinking and room temperature. I definitely need it with a vat of port.

With comedy stuff on cans and the attitude that it's only going to get better I don't see how I can lose. After this I am going to have some carols, maybe some cheesy xmas hits.

I figure this is pretty much my last blog of the year and even though I have nothing to say except happy christmas I felt the need to go on saying it....at length.



Ho ho ho.

Holiday Madness

I love xmas. Pretty much everything about it.

I love the lights, the food, the giving and receiving of gifts, putting up the tree even the pony TV. It's the only time of year when i think I wonder if mary poppins is on or I hope Digby the biggest dog in the world will be on this year.

I get a bit ticked off with how corporations drag christmas about and make it cheap. They force it to whore itself in every shop window from october onwards. It makes me a bit sad.

I remember when I was so excited from December the first when I got to open the advent calendar (what the hell do they make that chocolate out of? I don't know anything that tastes like that). December used to take years to get through, each day bringing me to a new level of hysteria (but enough about last year).

It would be nice if I could get back that feeling. Being a kid around Christmas is the best. Actually waiting for Santa on Christmas eve? When you think about it nothing comes close as an adult (well there was this one girl... but that's a whole other blog weirdly enough involving stockings).

I think this year I might try to be more christmassy. I sorted my shopping early so I don't need to have the frantic worry about whether I have bought the right gift for the right person. I may need a run up but I will attempt to hit a festive high (not easy for a grumpy old grinch like myself). I will try not to tut at the piercing sounds of slade, I will not complain at the TV guide full of musicals, I will even eat sprouts (actually not that hard as I like them which is weird in itself as there was a time when I would have rather eaten dog biscuits).

I am looking forward to the break from work as it's been a pretty tough year.

On an aside wouldn't it be cool if we had a white xmas? I have seen snow on christmas day in years. Oh crap, I sound like me dad (as well as foight like me da).

All in all I am feeling pretty lucky. It's not long before I stop work. I am off delivering gifts this weekend so I get to see my nephews and family. I have finished shopping except for one last gift and how long will that take? Does that sound like famous last words to anyone else?

Roll on Christmas.

In case it all goes pearshaped and there is no more blogging, have a Merry Chrstmas and a Happy New year all. Catch you on the tail end of my hangover.

Can I pull this off?

I have problems shopping. I am ok with this. I am a man, we are not supposed to be able to make fashion decisions. I get around my disability by talking a woman with me when I go. I try something on and ask, "Will this get me laid?". If the answer is yes I buy it.

I guess the above method is a little simplistic but it works for me. When I don't have a woman present I get a little nervous. I can usually get stuff that looks good on me but I have, on occasion, made the odd faux pas. These items live at the back of my wardrobe and mock me whenever I open it.

I can't throw them away, what if the bin man saw them? He would then know that I once thought I would look good in whatever couture of satan he finds. These bastards hang about, undermining my confidence in my own decision making.

So I went shopping the other day. I found some shirts I liked. Grabbed a quartet in small and headed into the changing room. I came out, grabbed some in medium and put the small back.

What? Like I have any idea what size I am, I have to think when someone asks me my age!

Anyway, I tried them on. One was a definite no, two were very possible but similar to shirts I already own, the last one put me in a quandry.

It was a dress shirt but looked good with jeans. I was pretty sure it would look good. My problem arose when I tried it on. I had to ask myself, "Could I pull this off?".

If I am in a Vince mood the the coolest clothes are whatever I select. When I hit a Howard low I don't think I could have carried it. Did I really want to spend my hard earned on something I could only wear when I am on the crest of the confidence wave?

Tricky business this shopping.

Oh happy day

Just had some of the best ever news.

It doesn't matter what, just that it's the kind of news that makes you glad to be alive.

No anger today, no carping, whining, yelling, ranting or otherwise sounding off. I am going to get a decent wine and enjoy it while it lasts.

Peace and love to all.

Overthinking

I have a real problem with this. Seriously. I will pull stuff apart in my head and use it to make myself miserable.

This is a bad thing. All that look before you leap crap is all very well but once you have leapt you shouldn't feel the need to pick apart every facet of the decision and use it to work out why you are a bad person.

Introspection can lick the sweat from my stinky bridge.

Anyway, I tend to rebound between extremes. I tend to leap on things like and excited kitten then suffer when I realise it's the iron. Burnt paws are where that sort of behaviour leads. On the other hand if you just sit about and don't make the occasional leap you will be taken to the vets and put down for being boring.

Ok, this entry has taken a turn down a dark path.I wouldn't really put a kitten down if it was boring. I'd buy it a playmate, like a rotweiler (joke!).

Anyway, I think my problem is that I worry too much. Sometimes shit happens. Sometimes it's my fault. I don't deliberately screw up so maybe I need to cut myself some slack when I do.

Other people? No, fuck them. If they screw up the should burn in hell, IN HELL I TELLS YER!

Aaaaaaaaaaaah the cool breeze of moderation in action!

Long story short, I kind of envy those people who can meander through the wreckage and accept that they didn't mean it, then stop worrying about it. They actually just lay it down and forget about it! Marvellous.

Am I envying a sociopathic personality disorder? Hmm. May need to sit a spell and think that over. Somebody pass me my pipe!